Episode 18

full
Published on:

20th Nov 2023

169: "I can have the cookie if I want to, and I'm really clear if I actually want this now or not." Anna Wood Teaches Wellness Over Weight Loss

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Last Updated: September 2, 2024

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169: "I can have the cookie if I want to, and I'm really clear if I actually want this now or not." Anna Wood Teaches Wellness Over Weight Loss

Have you ever felt that the mainstream fitness industry sets unrealistic or extreme standards? Founder of Shaped By Strength Anna Wood certainly has.

Jen Amos speaks with Anna Wood to hear her experience as an immigrant military spouse adjusting to a new country while her husband was deployed. As a Service2CEO Alumni and Service2CEO Chapter Lead of The Rosie Network, she learned to design her business in a way that doesn't conform to mainstream fitness industry standards. She encourages her clients to focus on wellness rather than weight loss and making fitness accessible in a way that fits into people's lives. Listen to Anna's story of resilience, innovation, and giving back to the community.

This episode is also available on YouTube: https://youtu.be/IA8CBaV2HsA

Connect with Anna Wood and Shaped By Strength

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Transcript

Jen Amos 0:01

Okay. All right. And with that said, I am incredibly excited to welcome Anna wood to season seven of holding down the fort. Anna, welcome to the show.

Unknown Speaker 0:11

Hi, I'm so happy to be here.

Jen Amos 0:13

Yes. And so I want to open it. I want I want to open this up with an icebreaker question. I have five cards in front of me. And I would like for you to pick a number between one to five and I will pick the card for you. Three, okay, that's the middle one. All right. That was the funny one. Okay, do your plants thrive or die in your care in your care? And explain

Speaker 1 0:36

I only have plastic plants. So I have learned my lesson. I have the black some of that. You know, my cats are thriving, but that's because they are they speak up and they ask for food. But you know, like the approach that I like I saw this tweet on, did my plants actually die? Or did they just not have what it takes to thrive in this fast paced environment? So yeah, all plastic and they look phenomenal.

Jen Amos 1:05

There you go, Hey, plastic plants go a long way. They still I feel like they still like make a room feel alive. And good thing is you don't have to water it. So like my my mom in law recently, not recently. But a couple months ago, when she was downsizing, she gave us a bunch of her plants. And so far, I'd say that one of them is thriving pretty well the other but that's only because like, it's just one of those plants that doesn't need a lot of love and attention. And the rest of them are in the front yard. And they're all covered by weeds because we didn't realize how intense summer can be, and how quickly weeds and plants and everything grows. We haven't had a front yard in a very long time. So the fact that we have one now it's like, Oh, we got to take care of this. And it's a lot harder than we thought like we were optimistic in the wintertime, when you know, nothing wasn't growing. And now everything's growing and we just kind of gave up. So we're gonna have to get a gardener. But anyway, other than that, thank you for indulging me in that icebreaker question to just get us to warm up, I always find those really fun. And I'm just excited to chat with you, Anna, you know, something that I have learned about you so far is that you are heavily invested in the military spouse community. And considering how you yourself are also a military spouse. So tell us a little bit about that. And what does it look like to give back and, and, you know, give your time to the military spouse community today?

Speaker 1 2:31

d now. She's like taking like:

Jen Amos 4:45

It's all good. It's all good.

Speaker 1 4:47

Yeah, I'm going to pause for the plane like Yeah, I think we know like we just wait for the jet to pass.

Jen Amos 4:55

Yeah, no, I totally understand. So yeah, we live in. We live in Virginia. and Hampton Roads like millet big military town. So it's kind of like, alright, just you know, you know the drill.

Speaker 1 5:05

Exactly, yeah. Yeah, I didn't know if it like the microphone picks it up, but I'm just going to wait until I hear it's, it's gone. So

Jen Amos 5:15

ya know, whatever, whatever helps for you. And obviously, it's your audio quality at the end of the day. So yeah, if you don't want that to get picked up while you're talking, then, you know, might as well

Speaker 1 5:24

I don't know how much it comes across. But sometimes when they are closer, like they set off, like car alarms and stuff. So it's like, really, yeah, because like, this is not like we are not on base, but we are close to an airport where they actually do practice. And they like fly over this area a lot. So like sometimes it's okay, sometimes it's, it's really

Jen Amos 5:48

crazy. Like, wow, yeah, I totally understand.

Speaker 1 5:51

Alright, but I think it's gone now. So all right, all right. So at the networking events, what I love, for example, at the last one, there was a spouse who came and she's, she's a new mom. And she was like, hey, you know, I have my eight month old at home, and I just had such a hard times so far. And I haven't been going back out to the community. And it was like, Who is who keeps on inviting me to these events. And I'm like that that was me, I'm sorry about the Facebook notifications, which is like, yeah, like this is, this is what I need, I need to, I need to get out and talk to other people and find out what's going on. And she got so many good tips. And she was going like, okay, like, I know what my next steps are. Because and that's, that's what I want people to take away from anything that I do is that you go home, and you know what to do next. Because I've been to events where Oh, it feels good in the moment, and then you go home, and you know, I would come home, my husband is still gone. I still don't know what to do. And I'm just like, I sit there and look around and like okay, what now? So that's that's the feeling that I don't want anybody to feel?

Jen Amos 7:01

Yeah, yeah, you want to feel like you have a sense of direction and purpose. And, you know, you don't want to leave these kinds of events, kind of like okay, well, that was fun. And now what do I do with myself. And I really like how you said that. You want to help military spouses, because you see yourself in them, especially the ones who are fairly new and struggling. And it's great to want to help out in that way and have that level of compassion. Because, you know, when I think about what you're what I think about what you're describing, and reminds me of when they say to service members, like Oh, thank you for your service, thank you for your service. But it's like, I often find that's like the most annoying thing anyone in our military community can hear. It's like, okay, like, thanks. You know, it's like, it's not it doesn't go any further than that. It's almost like it, I think it's almost dismissive, you know, for some people to just say thank you for your service. And so, I really like how you, you want to be involved in in the spouses lives and make sure that they have a sense of purpose or like action steps so that when they leave, like the social gathering, it's not just like, Okay, I'm back home, what do I do with myself, you know, so I think that's wonderful. Thank you. Yeah. And I know that right now you are helping helping out with the Rosa network. And I feel like I can kind of relate to this in a sense, because right now, we are partnering with the rosary network to do our show hold down the fort. You know, you helping the road network is kind of like a full circle moment for you. Because you are part of their cohort like way early on. So tell us about that. And how here you are years later, continuing to help the rose network.

Speaker 1 8:36

Yeah, it's it is a first full circle moment. And I just love what the Rosa network does so much, and just an amazing organization and an amazing example of you know what to do next. And you know, like it's just such a good resource and for me, when I first heard about them, I saw a Facebook post by somebody there's a legal workshop for for military and spouses about small business and you can come and I'm like, I'm okay, like I'm like, vaguely interested in this but I honestly don't believe that I could do anything like that for like a couple more years or something like that. That just seems like you know, way too far out and way too complicated. But I'm gonna go and see what's up. Yeah. And I actually ended up on being in cohort number two back in the day Wow. So great. So low G right. Yeah. Oh, G way. Oh, yeah. So um, that was a while back but um, I have been in connection with the Rosa network ever since because it's just such a great community and such an amazing network and even you know, when you finish a cohort, that's not the end of it. You can stay connected and you can find out about so many things that are going on and keep continue to get help and continue to do Be a part of that community. And that's, that's another way that is just so helpful. So I, obviously when they asked me if I wanted to be the chapter lead for the summer cohort for Wounded Warrior Project, I was like, yes, absolutely, I would, I would love to do it. Exactly for that reason, because I remember how I was so hesitant, and I had no idea what I if I would even be able to do something like that. Wow. And they really, they really helped me discover, you know, how much I was actually able to do that. And I like to say this, you know, people in the Rosa network like the they believed in me before I believed in myself. And especially for me, as a fitness business owner times have been challenging. You know, you can have your, you can have your doors open to see clients in person. And so many times, I would just feel like, you know, like, this was great, but do I actually have what it takes? Like, am I am I still a person who can help? And I would see somebody post in the alumni Facebook group, I would see a post from the rose network pop up. I'm like, oh, yeah, like this. Yeah, this is why I was doing this. So just like that, getting those reminders and staying plugged in there. Yeah, I think I'm probably skipping over something.

Jen Amos:

Oh, no, no, you're definitely you're on track, like, you know, talking about how, just to recap, like talking about how the road network saw something in you before you saw something in yourself. And even though you were asking yourself those questions like, you know, who am I can I do this? And this reminds me of our offline conversation where we're talking about the imposter syndrome. And, you know, when I was talking to you, some time ago, I was early a couple of days ago, actually, when I was talking about this, I was like, you know, you give me this impression, like I have, I got this impression from you that the imposter syndrome doesn't faze you, you seem to be very confident, you seem to lean into things you seem to take on challenges, like the scuba diver program, which we'll get. We'll talk a little bit about later. And then you surprise me by saying, Oh, no, I feel it all the time. You know, so I feel it. So tell us about that. And also how, even though you have all those those thoughts? You don't let it define you either.

:

Yeah, so about the imposter syndrome. And that's something that, you know, I used to think I was alone with that. And that's why I think it's important that we talk about it, because one, you know, one instance that really changed that was a conversation with other people who I was. And I still am looking up at the time and inspiring people who you find. So inspiring people that you are looking up to, and you just believe that, you know, they are never, they will never feel like they're like they of course they don't have impostor syndrome. And when somebody like that is being honest and says, Oh, yeah, I experienced this all the time. And then you're just you're allowed to see it as something that just happens, regardless of who you are and what you do, and not see it as something that is there to stop you. Or to make you feel lesser by yourself, which is something that's there and and I'm going to call follow up. Yeah, go ahead. Yeah. I'm saying like this is

Jen Amos:

you got this. Yeah, great. It's Friday. It's fine. I know. You just had to work out. I just, I didn't do it. Yeah,

:

it's my allergies. I'm going to your editing guy or something. Yeah, no, he's also sending some extra love to whoever's

Jen Amos:

editing this name is Dennis. So you could say Thank you, Dennis.

Unknown Speaker:

Thank you, Dennis. And I'm sorry.

Jen Amos:

Oh, good. He's worked with me for like, three, four years at this point. So he gets it. It's totally fine. He I talked to him all the time, even while I'm recording with guests, so it's totally fine.

:

Yeah. Okay, awesome. That makes me feel a lot less bad. Yeah, you'll be fine. Okay, so we were on impostor syndrome. Yeah. So

Jen Amos:

just not giving it like so much merit. Yeah.

:

Go ahead, how you phrase how you frame things in your mind. And if you think about, if I'm feeling that imposter syndrome, that can mean that oh, I'm not good enough. Or I shouldn't do this. Or that can mean No, I feel this way because I care about it. I want to do a good job. And all of your thoughts and because this relates back a lot of times to to fitness and if you feel like you know, I don't feel good enough and I don't know good enough and I just don't think that I'm worth it and people are going to criticize me if I go into the gym and they are go into point in me and laugh at me. And that could mean, yeah, I just have this inner critic and they hate me. So I hate myself. Or that could mean that I have an inner voice that knows pain, and they are just trying to make sure that I don't feel that pain. So I can say, thank you, I'm going to be okay. And then it's not something that stops you. But it's something that actually tells a good positive story about you.

Jen Amos:

Yeah, absolutely. Speaking of which, I'd love to hear about your fitness training business. Because in addition to these thoughts of like, you know, can I do this, like, who am I to do this imposter syndrome, just acknowledging all the things, you know, I know that when you were first, starting your fitness, or you were, you know, kind of creating the idea, being part of the cohort program at the Rose network, you you had these, you had a certain view of what it means to be in fitness training, like you have to work at a gym, or you have to yell at your clients or kind of thing. And the road network helped you open your eyes to designing your fitness training business the way that you wanted to design it, so So tell us about that.

:

Yeah, I had a lot of things about the fitness industry and how fitness training is conducted in general, that really turned me off. And that was from my own journey, I had an eating disorder. And I recovered from that eating disorder, but you know, that it's not just about food, it's about how you see yourself and your body image, what are the things that you are telling yourself, and I knew that working out and exercise was always important for me. I used to do martial arts competitions when I was a teenager, I just love movement and like challenging myself, and, and, you know, doing fun things and being active. So as a part of my recovery, I still thought that I would like to find my way back to that. But to be able to do that, without that layer of your appearance, being the most important thing. And, you know, somebody yelling at you let go of work harder, because you need to burn those snacks off. Like, I'm actually not trying to burn out snacks.

Jen Amos:

I enjoyed those snacks, by the way. Yes, I

:

had a really good time with those snacks. And they're actually allowing me to do this right now. So thank you so much. Yes, I need the calories actually like that they are saying? Yes. So um, and back at the time, like I knew I had this perspective that I wanted to bring to fitness. But I did residency a mainstream way to be able to do that. Because if I wanted to work at a big dream, like they have, they have their expectations already set up. And I remember like one interview and they're like, Yeah, and you have in your pay structure, these supplements that you that you can, can but you know, you're like expected to sell them like, yeah, I don't believe in that supplement. I don't want to sell that fat burner to anybody. Like I'm not, I'm not comfortable selling somebody something that I don't believe in. Yeah, so that was something that was really helped out by by the Rosen network, and sue them realizing that I do have an avenue of doing things my way. And being able to express myself and interact with clients the way I want to. And that was just such an important shift to see that, yeah, I can actually do things the way I want to do them. And I don't have to subscribe to anybody else's idea that I don't agree with.

Jen Amos:

You know, I really like hearing that. I got to say that at the beginning of last year, I hired these coaches, specifically because they had a very compassionate approach to your fitness. It wasn't about like, Hey, you got to cut out everything and have a strict diet. It was, it was kind of like their strategy was like, hey, just, you know, instead of having, like Ben and Jerry's have like a keto friendly ice cream, you know, like, they taught how to replace it's like, hey, instead of eating I can't think of examples right now. Because instead of drinking like soda, do like soda water and like squeeze lemon in it, you know, that's still you know, you still get the carbonated water in it. And, and so I that was actually kind of like the first experience of me thinking like, oh, like, like fitness, and taking care of my health doesn't have to be so intense. It doesn't have to be so dramatic. In fact, it was the reason why I stopped because I was like, I I feel like if I have to get into it, I have to like go all in 100% and, you know, people like my husband, they can do that they he can go cold turkey and you know, like do his strict diet and do really well. But like for me, I just I just couldn't. I wasn't I'm not wired that way like I have to, I have to enjoy the journey, you know, because I don't like to see, you know, fitness and eating as, as a chore or as a sin. You know, like, just because I'm enjoying like cookies or whatever. I love cookies by the way. It's like my if you ask my favorite to Yeah, if you ask me what my favorite thing is, it's cookies. I love cookies, chocolate chip cookies specifically. And I am the Cookie Monster. No. Yeah, you know, I think it's just like, I do think that there's, there's a, there's definitely an avenue for what you're offering. Because even even actually, just today I saw one of my friends in my, in the, in some of the forums I'm a part of she was talking about how one of the things that she wishes she could do but doesn't do it is go to the gym, because it's like a whole event. So you know, you gotta like get up and go to the gym. And then you got to like, come back and shower and eat it's a whole thing. And then there's the workout itself. And it just seems like so intense. It just seems like it always has to be this intense thing. And, and so I really like what I'm hearing from you, how you decided to design your training differently. And I do think that there's a market for that. I think that, you know, people need to give them like the point is movement rights movement. And like, I mean, you actually you tell me, what do you feel like is, yeah, because I'm not the expert. I'm just talking about what I've learned, but you're the expert, and I need to stop talking. So what is like, what would you say is the point of you know, why you do what you do and why you want people to, you know, incorporate, like, some kind of fitness regimen into their day to day lives.

:

You know, the reason for me is that, you know, Fitness is important. We all know this, and health is important. And we know this, and we hear it and you know, a lot of times, I'm so fed up with that, like, I know, it's important, whatever, yeah. But the thing that I saw, as I was going down the rabbit hole of my eating disorder was how something that seems like motivational or inspirational fitness advice. And something that's just casually thrown out there is actually leading down a pathway that can be a really harmful. And you know, not, not everybody necessarily goes down that far. But there's, it's like a spectrum of like, oh, this is healthy. And this is good for me. And it just goes into this is restriction. This is limiting my enjoyment. This is limiting my, my joy. This is limiting how much energy I have for the rest of my life. Yeah. And really, just to reframe thinking, even that, like black and white thinking, like it has to be all or nothing. And because what we see, like, you know, if you think about like, what, what is fitness on TV, it's like, you know, somebody's like, eating spinach and throwing up in the trashcan. And you know, I always have like, you know, you're not supposed to be throwing up in the trash can on your first personal training session that's not in the package, we don't do that. It's that extreme. And that's why it's hard to think about making it a part of your life, because you're not thinking about something that is actually tailored for you and it can fit into your life. And it makes sense for you just like, Oh, if I really liked this one thing, but I want to make it fit better. And I swap it to something that I still like or you know, honestly, for me, like I even have the thing, because I know how to stay balanced. And I don't tell myself that I can't have anything. Yeah. Because once once you get into that black and white thinking, you know, the cookie is going to taste like 10 times better when you're thinking about it, and you're not allowed to have it. Yeah. It's just like, like, I'm like, I don't have self control. Because I'm thinking about the cookie. Yeah, yeah. No, no, like, you know, what I what I want to get people to is I can have the cookie if I want to. And I'm really clear if I actually want this now or not. And I'm not in that constant state of I'm not allowed to. Yeah, yeah. And yeah, and those like that types. I like that black and white thinking. And I think the biggest scam scan that's in the fitness industry is step one, you have to start with hating yourself and then step two will tell you how to fix it. Real if you think about a lot of times, like would you have even bought that thing or thought about wanting that thing or doing that thing if the step one was not Ooh, this is going to fix something about me that's not good enough. Yeah. And for me to not have to start from like, Oh, you want to have your whatever look like this then you have to do this and like no like you're okay how you are right now. And I'm not going to require you to start hating yourself for motivation and start beating yourself up for motivation, your model Vision is going to be how much more I can enjoy my life. If I add, if I add being fed or being strong to it is, you know, a lot of times I have moms coming to me and they start with I need to lose weight. And, and I understand that and you know, like, I'm not saying that nobody should ever lose weight, like I understand that everybody has different goals. So everybody's journey is going to look different. But what I say is, okay, that's that's the goal. And that's a valid goal. And we can keep it on your goals list. But that's not the only goal that you should be thinking about. Because if that's your only goal, and you're fixated on a certain number, or you're fixated on a certain dress size, and that's the only thing that's in the in, in your mind, when you don't get it, you fail, it doesn't matter what else happened, it doesn't matter if you've been getting stronger, it doesn't matter if you've been feeling better, it doesn't matter if you've just been having more energy. As long as you're just focused on that one thing, you don't notice anything else about how amazing you are. Especially for, especially for a mom who's coming to me, you know, I understand that you want to lose that weight, but also what if you had more strength, and you know, you could take all the groceries in in one trip if you need to. Or you could pick your kids up, or you could run after them and be stronger. And you know, one of the goals that somebody listed that I really love is I want to be able to dance and my granddaughter's wedding. Oh, isn't that such a better goal? Like if you're working? Yeah, like, yeah, you're imagining yourself on that day, and you're, you're fed and you have that energy instead of like, five more pounds?

Jen Amos:

Yeah, it's like, what, what is the weight loss? Gonna get you anyway? You know, like, what, what do you? What do people even imagine is? Are they going to attain when they lose the weight, right? Like, I love that specific goal of like, I just want to, I just want to dance with my granddaughter for a wedding like that. So yeah, cool.

:

Yeah, that's, that's the image that you're told that you are going to be happy when you get there. And as somebody who went down and took that message way too seriously, I was never happy. It doesn't matter how skinny I was. I was never happy and there was always more I could have done and honestly, it got even worse and worse. And the more you focus on, on your appearance, the more you focus on meeting a goal that's not even necessarily that meaningful. It's not expressed in a meaningful way that brings joy and and brings liveliness to your life, the more you're focused on that, the less happy you are going to become. And you believe that that happy state is there. When I get to my goal. And it's not and you get better and you feel you feel even worse. Yeah. And then you are going to go for even more extreme things, or you're going to fall off. And that and not care about your health at all. Because we believe that if I care about my health being fed being healthiest that extreme, and that didn't work, and it didn't make me happy. Right, right. That's why it's not sustainable.

Jen Amos:

So you're saying that in the fitness industry, the biggest scam, the biggest lie is telling yourself that you need to hate yourself first. And then this is how we can fix you. What is your step one, when you talk to your clients? Instead of saying you need to hate yourself and I will fix you?

:

Yeah, my step one is, and it's not going to be Oh, you have to love yourself. Yeah. Oh, no, you don't have to hate yourself. You have to love yourself. But I actually understand that you if especially and I think most of us have been conditioned, there's always something that you don't like about yourself. And you've been practicing this for years and years and years. And in that mind, necessarily. It might change it might not necessarily be the same thing the whole time. But there's always something in life that's changed with that changed. And it's really hard to switch them is a no I love that about myself. And you know, you might be able to do that. And that's great if you can do that. But the first step is to be like, Okay, this is my body and it's just this. Yeah, I love that. For me. It does things and I don't have to love it and I don't need to hate it. I can just be neutral and accept it. Okay, it is and it's neither good or bad thing. From then on. You can build more of more of your relationship for self love, but you can't, you know, read 100 or 100 affirmations to yourself today and you're magically going to live Have yourself when you've been practicing hating yourself. I think the first step is accepting, okay. It is what it is. And it's okay. Yes. And I don't have to, I don't have to have any kind of positive or negative feeling about it in order for me to actually do the best thing for him.

Jen Amos:

Yeah, yeah, I think it's just learning to what I'm hearing is it doesn't have to be a big deal. The whole, like, your whole fitness journey, it doesn't have to be a big deal. It doesn't have to be dramatic, it doesn't, you know, it doesn't have to be black or white, all or nothing. It could just be, it could be mellow. It could, it could just get to middle. And, and so yeah, I really resonate with that, because the all or nothing thinking the black and white thinking was very real for me for a long time. And, you know, you're in San Diego, like, I lived in SoCal for 20 years. And all you get are those kind of messages, you know, about like, hey, you know, like, like, you know, like, lose all this weight, and you'll be pretty, you'll be happy. And, you know, we live so close to Hollywood, like, there's just that, you know, feeling of having to look and be a certain way. And, and, and I remember, there was a time when I finally decided, like, you know, what, like, my body made it this far in life, you know, I still have all my five senses. Like, I wake up in the morning, like, I'm in good, I'm in the best health I can be at this point. Let me let me love myself for where I'm at right now. And not make it about the weight. And, you know, I even went as far as, you know, just buying clothes that I felt more comfortable in rather than, like, you know, having those pair of jeans where it's like, maybe one day of it back in, like, you know, donating all my high school clothes that I really shouldn't be wearing anyway, even if I did fit in them, because those are way out of style. And they're old. And you know, just like being able to adapt to who you are today. So I love that first step of like, you know, learning to love yourself in this very moment and accept who you are. And just starting from there, because yeah, there's just this weird, negative, you know, type of motivation in the fitness industry to hate yourself first. And, you know, maybe it worked well for marketing and advertising for people to buy whatever products that feed into your insecurity. But like you said, in the long run, it's just not sustainable.

:

Exactly. And this is what I love reminding everybody because we need these reminders. There should be nothing in your closet that makes you feel lesser about yourself. Love it. I, I went through this as well. And you know, I did gain a lot of weight after I caught COVID Because that was like a big challenge for me as a personal trainer, because as part of my recovery, I had so much joint pain. For the first two weeks, I couldn't even walk on the stairs. Wow. So it was like, um, this is gonna be fun. This is my job. And there was this one cropped up was like off sports ball cropped up. And it was just there hanging in the closet and there was like, this doesn't fit. And I'm like, this doesn't fit I I could like put it on and be like, Oh, no, I still feel great about it. But I like I'm not going to feel great about it. And I was like, You know what, you are a crafter of like, I buy you to make me feel good about myself. So if you're not going to do that you can leave. So it's just like, yeah, like, I'm not going to like it's your job to fit me. It's not my job to fit you cropped up. Thanks.

Jen Amos:

I love that reframe. It's like, hey, so we're gonna have to let you go. Yeah, you no longer fit with the company goals here. So thank you.

:

So far, yes, we can go to the donation, go to a thrift. Exactly.

Jen Amos:

I love that.

:

That's that's what I did when I donated all of the clothes that no longer fit me after my recovery. Because I was so sad because I love them. And there were so many beautiful things. But I and they were there for a while. And then there was that weight in the class and I would look at them. And I would just be reminded that, you know, it's for the better. But I'm not going to fit into those anymore in my life. And I shouldn't because if I if I ever fill in those again, I'm not in a good place. Yeah, so I decided, you know, I'm going to let go of these clothes. And I'm going to say to myself, I'm releasing these for somebody who is going to feel happy wearing them when they are at a weight that is healthy for them. They just weren't for me.

Jen Amos:

Yeah, that's beautiful. I just I'm taking all the affirmation reframes. Goodbye letters here. Yeah. You know, it's allowing yourself to go through that grieving process. You know, that's, that's who you were at a certain time, like those clothes represented who you were, but they don't have to represent like, who you're going to stay to be because you're not that person anymore. And, and that should be a good thing. Like I think about, like I mentioned, like the the high school clothes and all the things that I've recently donated, or that I've been donating throughout throughout the years, really. And I just think to myself, like, even if I could fit in those again, like, I'm not that person anymore, like I'm not, I don't even like that style, and it'll bring me back to insecurities that I've let go of. So I really love, you know, talking about the grieving process and also the self acceptance, you know, of who you are today, like, like, you are just as beautiful. Now, as you were back then, you know, and, and we got to, we got to hire clothes that are going to make us look good, not, you know, the other way around. So I really, I really love that attitude. And I think that if anyone you know, it's summertime, the time that we're recording this, so if anyone hears this, or when people hear this, you know, hopefully you'll feel reassured that, hey, if that bikini doesn't fit you anymore, it's okay to get another one. It's okay. It's okay to get a one suit. It's okay to style things, you know, I mean, this is gonna come out in the fall. So I don't think anyone's like wearing bathing suits at this time. But, you know, just allowing, you're giving yourself that ability to, to grow into different clothes, you know, and, and embracing who you are today, I think is beautiful. So, so thank you for that pep talk, Anna. Yeah, it's all the love and

:

being okay with change, because I hear that. So like, oh, I want to go back to where I look like this. So I want to go back to your body I had when and accepting the fact that you are not supposed to like changes, okay? And it's okay, if you don't look the same, or if things don't feel the same. Because it's life. And wherever you are right now. You are never going to be here again. Yeah, love it. And that's why like, it's important, because if you're looking at a certain point in your past, and you're setting that as an ideal, you're looking back at a past self, and you're ignoring who you are right now. Yeah. And there's a future self. Who is looking back on you right now. I'm like, wait, I need that love right now.

Jen Amos:

I just I'm just taking in everything you're saying. It's positive and reassuring. I was all like, just just rain on me with all this positive affirmation reassurance. It's like if you don't have your own podcast already, I'm telling you. Anyway, let's go ahead and talk about where you're at today with your business, Anna. I know that like many fitness, like many people in the fitness industry, you had a pivot during 2020. But I don't think it was for the worse. It sounds like you were able to pivot in a way that was exciting for you. So tell us about you know what your business looks like today?

:

Yeah, you know, it's exciting. Now, it was nerve wracking, at first to take everything online. But that's where I decided like, I actually want to do more online and have online offerings that I can have people access and not just one person at a time. Because if I can, if I can help more people in the same time, then you know, I'm getting a bigger the same thoughts. So that could be telling one person or the same workout that I could be doing for one person. If five people if 10 people could do it at the same time, then that's helping me get the message out that I wanted to get out in the first place. And what I'm doing right now is expanding my online courses. I started this first a year ago when I launched my scuba diving workouts which was funny it was actually a collaboration with one of the other businesses that we were in together in the Rosa network cohort. Jade scuba adventures shout out they came to me and they said you know we want to have workouts for our divers because we were looking for a while but there's really nothing that is specific to to diving skills and was like oh cool. Let me try this out. And let me see what movements do you need Let me see how it feels to be in the water. So based on that I created a workout program for divers. We tested the divers and it's it's really good and effective. And that was my first big workout program that's fully online so it's on demand you can access it and I don't need to be there next to you in the room at all. The complete instruction is just there and whenever you want to do your workout you can so realize you know this, this is something that I want to do more of. Right now I'm working on a mini course for for neck so if you have stiffness in your neck if you have of technique, if you're on your phone a lot, if you're on your computer a lot, if you just feel like, Ah, this is really tight. Yeah. How do we release that? And how do we like spend five to 10 minutes a day and get you back into better function and less pain. So I just want to continue building out programs like that, that are accessible, that are actually helpful for people. And it's not like, Oh, you hate how your butt looks? Let's do this five exercises, no, like, actually, this is going to improve your quality of life, and you're going to, you're going to be able to enjoy the rest of everything that you do more.

Jen Amos:

Yeah, yeah. I mean, I, for me, I think about what I like about fitness is more. So just being functional, you know, just being able to do basic things in life, like carrying the grocery bags to the house, or, you know, taking the step up to feed my cat in their cat tree, because it's so high up, you know, like, just basic things and having the kind of and I love, I love this mini program you're doing because like, everyone needs that. I mean, you and I are on a computer right now, like everyone exactly, has like shoulder issues, you know, I go to the chiropractor for this stuff. So like, so I think it's very relatable. And I just love hearing, you know, the initial collaboration you did for scuba divers. And then now this mini program, it's really exciting to hear how you have like transformed your business to be online and and I imagine that would probably open up more time for you to either create more courses or, you know, whatever you want to do with your time.

:

Well, that's a tricky part. Because, you know, it looks like if you open a video that's five minutes long, and you will notice, I don't know if all the listeners and like if you open up a video that's five minutes long, that doesn't take me five minutes to create. Got it got a whole lot more. So there's Yeah, that was the learning curve for me to realize like, oh, yeah, like, if I have to record these videos, I have to have the camera set up this way. Oh, you can see my head if I turn out. Okay. So, yeah, it's it, there's definitely a lot more to more to add them is visible on the surface. Yeah,

Jen Amos:

yeah, I will, I will say as a podcaster. There's a lot that happens in the post production for I mean, the planning, and then the post production and, of course, the marketing. So I can completely relate and understand to understand like what you're saying with that. But yeah, I just I just think it's really exciting either way to, you know, venture your business in this direction. And, and so you're going to pause real quick. So I'm thinking so a little sidebar. Is there anything else you want me to ask about your business today? Before we move into the next question of like, you know, what is financial stability and self sufficient self sufficiency look like for you today? Anything else we want to cover before we go there?

Unknown Speaker:

I think we are good there.

Jen Amos:

Cool. Cool. Okay, awesome. All right. Let me figure out how to wrap this up, man. Just think about this my head. Awesome. Okay, so I'll jump back in. But yeah, that's really exciting, Anna, and, you know, I, it's really cool to know that it took something as the Rosie network, oh, so many years ago, for you to see what's possible in your business, and be open to pivoting and doing things online, which is the direction you're gonna go anyway. And, you know, be able to do all those. So I'm just incredibly excited for you. And more importantly, I just really enjoy hearing you talk about, like, really interesting, really just encouraging people that fitness is more than just losing weight, it's more than hating yourself, there's so much more to it. And that's why I found myself, just kind of like being speechless after your talk. I was like, yeah, yeah, that's true. She's bright, you know, like, I feel, I feel so reassured, like listening to her. And if you don't start a podcast about it, you know, I'm just saying just just the thought there. But anyway, let's go ahead and move on here. So you know, considering that your involvement like, sorry, considering that you are involved with the Rosen network, you know, one thing that my company us by wealth and the rose network has in common is helping our military community really value like self sufficiency and financial stability, we have different vehicles and doing it, but essentially, you know, that is why we have aligned and why we have partnered up for the show hold down the fort, season seven. So with that being said, I, you know, here you are, in your journey, you've been in your business for a number of years now. I'm curious to know, you know, what is what does self sufficiency in your business look like for you today? And, and moving forward? If, you know, I would imagine that you'd want to have your business for another five, seven years.

:

You know, I'm to first talk about that. I'm going to take it to a direction that actually seems to go opposite from that, because in my learning curve about this about self sufficiency, I think there's mindset. And my husband was in this mindset, so I just kind of like, came into it when I get married to him, and then no, they're like how to necessarily navigate it at first, that you have to be self sufficient. And you must never ask for help. And you have to power through things. And at least from what I saw with him and some other people that I know, I don't know if this applies to everybody in the military, but there might be a little bit here and there that people could relate to. And for me, what I found really valuable is to actually be able to ask for help, to be able to turn to your community to be able to look at okay, what are the resources that are available for me? What are things that I can utilize to help me actually use those resources that that I have available? Maybe I won't necessarily apply for it, if I don't hear about it, or I think, Oh, that's not for me, that's, that's for somebody else who could use it better. And like, know, what it's for you hear about it, apply to those things, and use them because I, you know, from my point of view, as an immigrant spouse, and I think, probably for military spouses in general, you just have this mindset that yeah, this is just going to suck. And you are going to struggle, and that's it. And if you just say, Okay, this is a struggle, so this is just always going to be a struggle, and then you don't look outside for okay, how can this not be a struggle, and, you know, as strong as you are, and as much as you can do by yourself, if you don't find out how, how else are things could be done, or what else is available to you, you can really stay in that struggle and not even know that there's an option for you. And, you know, that's just going back to the roles and effort to and I talked to people a lot about resources and what's available. Because a lot, a lot of times we think like oh, if I, I need to get like education that worth, like, I don't know how many $1,000 Or I need to get so much done, or I need to have something that's like a really big thing. And it could actually be something simple, something that's a free resource or something that's a low cost resource that's available to you, specifically because of your military affiliation that can really help you along. So self sufficiency in that way of like, be able to ask for help when you when you need it. And again, like as strong as you are. That's not all you have to be. And you can say, Hey, I got this help. Like I'm saying right now, like, I went through this cohort, and it was awesome. And it really helped my business. But if I didn't do that I would not have a business.

Jen Amos:

Yeah, absolutely. I really like your take on self sufficiency. To me, it sounds like self educating, you know, educating on what are the resources that are available to you? You know, I think, yeah, I definitely think the word self sufficiency can be interpreted as, Oh, you got to do it all on your own, you got to be stoic about it, you know, you got to like, you know, not burden other people with your problems or your issues. And, and so, you know, maybe maybe, to some certain extent, that is important for certain times, but for the most part, you know, we need people we need people, we need help, we need support. And so I really like that, you know, for you, self sufficiency sounds more like, you know, educating yourself on the resources and the support like that you do already have available because you're connected to the military. Yeah,

Unknown Speaker:

that's a jet. Oh, god.

Jen Amos:

No, like, that's so funny. Oh, good. Oh, good. Yeah. And I, and I guess the, you know, the last question I want to ask for you is about, like, what does it mean for you to sustain your business financially, and part of where I'm coming from is it is my hope, my hope is for our community to know that. You could diversify, you could have options outside of that military paycheck, for example. And it doesn't mean you have to make a million dollars or whatever. But I am curious to know, you know, from your perspective as a military spouse, what what does financial stability look like for you?

:

Yeah, so that's, you know, I think that's an interesting topic, because a lot of times, as military spouses and as fitness instructors, it's like, Ooh, I will need to take like, I don't know five more spin classes that I need to teach or otherwise things are going to look really bad right here. So yeah, there's definitely been times like that where I would not see how things would add up and Yeah, that's, that's a part of that trying to think of what is the scale of what I'm doing. Because I used to teach a lot of classes I used to have just, you know, I would wake up at 5am. And then I would have a client at 530. And we would just go on, and I would like, try to eat some lunch, but then we would, then I would be teaching a spin class, and I would be going to the next class from that, and I would have clients in the evening, and then they totally burnt out. And if I get sick, then that's it. Like I'm out for a week, I can work. So for me personally, that's what I believe. Having online offering helps a lot with because it doesn't rely on me physically being present. And that was a really big learning curve for me. As I was recovering from COVID, as well, because I realized that I can physically sustain that. And so what is what is me what what is my business going to be what is me as a trainer going to be, if I can't be there physically, and I don't necessarily have to stand there next seal, to give you value, to give you something that is going to help you to give you something that is going to improve your life, improve your mobility, improve your fitness, and being able to think along the lines of how can I turn what I know, into something that can be accessed in a way where I'm not there?

Jen Amos:

Yeah, well, what a what an exciting journey to be on in your business, I think, I think that is the hope for every entrepreneur is like, how do I step away from this, and it still operates, and I still get paid. And I'm glad that that is, you know, the the stage of business that you're in, because I do imagine that you know, as a fitness trainer, it is, it could be assumed that you have to be present, you have to be there, you have to give your undivided attention to someone, and you have found a way to duplicate yourself in a sentence with these online courses. So so I'm excited for you, Anna, and to see how that's gonna continue to play out for you and what what other programs you come up with to hopefully, you know, work work alongside of you doing the one to ones like you want to it sounds like you kind of have a variety of offerings. So that in case in case you do you are out again for a week, at least you can rely on your your online courses.

:

Exactly. And that's what I want to say about, you know, being being resourceful and because you know, you can be really effective, doing more of the things that are not necessarily sustainable, because just like I used to put a lot of energy into, sometimes I would teach like 1013 classes a week and on top of my clients, and it was exhausting. Well, you know, like, oh, yeah, I'm in really great shape, I can do one more, and I can take on this, you know, somebody needs, somebody needs to substitute the spin class, I can do that I can be 7am, I can do this. And a lot of times they're like, oh, yeah, I'm really good, because I'm taking it on on all of these things. And I'm really good at dealing with this. But why unnecessarily? Don't see as that I could take that energy and think about instead of keeping this going, what is something else that I could do that would be just as effective. But if I take my if I take my self esteem from Oh, I can keep this going. And I can work really hard on this, that I'm not necessarily going to be able to explore another option.

Jen Amos:

Yeah. Yeah. Wonderful. Well, and as we start to get to a close here, I want to make sure that you share everything you want to share, especially to our military community. So is there any parting thoughts or main takeaways you want to share with our community, whether they're entrepreneurs or not?

:

The really appreciate the power that's in community. And if you're struggling with something, don't be afraid to open up and ask if there's somebody there in the room with you, who would be able to offer some tips or who knows about a resource is if you keep it to yourself and you think that Oh, nobody else has this problem. Or if I open up about this, I'm just going to show that I'm weak, then you're going to be struggling by yourself and maybe the person next to you has the exact same problem and you guys will never know. I I had that there was a there was a network workshop as well about business planning, of all things. And I was talking about my experience from recall Going from from an eating disorder. But I don't really know if this applies to anybody, like, I just feel like I'm alone with this. And I don't know if anybody else would care about it. And I'm the person who was facilitating the workshop. He said, Okay, so everybody in the room, put up your hand, if you had an eating disorder, if you know somebody who had an eating disorder, or anything along that Canada was just like, so many hands. And I was like, Okay, I could actually open up about this more. And there will be people who this really resonates with. And I guess my takeaway is that, like, don't be afraid to connect. Don't be afraid to, to lean on your community, because ultimately, your community is why you make it and you can find the people that are going to be there, and they're going to be helpful.

Jen Amos:

Love it. And I think, you know, I think what I'm hearing from you is community is healing. Yes. So wonderful. Well, and I feel like this was a very, very loving conversation. I feel like our listeners are gonna be like, Yeah, I needed to hear this today. So I, I really, really want to thank you so much for your time. We're, this is a side conversation. We're a little over. But I did want to ask if you like, if you had a question for me, like it's okay, if you don't I just that was kind of the last thing I was gonna ask you. But we can also just wrap up too, if you feel like you've shared everything.

Unknown Speaker:

Yeah, actually. Yeah.

Jen Amos:

You do have a question or Oh, you do? I do. Okay. Let me check in real quick. Yeah. So. So yeah. Last thing I wanted to ask you. And I feel like I said this three times already. But one thing I always like to do with the guests nowadays is to ask them if, you know, turn the tables around and ask if you have a question for me. So do you have anything you want to ask me out? Before we go?

:

Yes, and they do have a question to you. And this could go out to anybody else in the audience too. And just to finish on that positive and encouraging note and have something that you can take away with you and remind yourself is my my company's shaped by strength. Strength doesn't mean a look or one certain physique, it doesn't even have to mean something physical, it's something that you find within yourself. For me, the way I define strength is strength is something strength is overcoming something that has the power to destroy you. So, it could be you know, it could be whatever it is for you. But I would like to ask you, in your opinion, what are your top three strengths that make you you?

Jen Amos:

Oh, that's so fun. Okay, I'm gonna, I'm gonna just give like my like, what? What comes to mind? The first thing, what makes me strong is what you're saying? That's question. So the first thing is my faith, I'm a very, I'm a Christian, and I'm a very spiritual person. So that helps a lot for me is like having having a resource like a Bible to refer to and be reminded that I'm loved. So that's, that's the first one. The second one is I, it's having learned how to self parent, you know, I grew up as a, like, even though I wasn't the oldest, I was the eldest daughter, and my mom leaned against me a lot, especially when my dad passed away. And I was a middle child. So I was also neglected on a lot of levels. Anyone can understand middle middle child syndrome here. And so I had to learn to self parent and I think that that is a strength of mine to like, like, soothe myself, you know, like, be able to unpack my emotions and comfort myself. So I think that is the second strength. And then the third one is, I think, just sharing that with others. Like, it's like, if I can, there's a phrase that goes like, while while hurt people, hurt people, healed people heal people. And I Yeah, and I'd like to believe that I've gone through a lot of personal development and help to the point where I feel like I can be, you know, an asset in people's lives. I could be, you know, I could be validating reassuring and loving and, you know, kind of what you're like, similar to what I feel from you. It's like, like, love yourself as you are, you know, come as you are, like, you you've always been enough. Now it's just a matter of like, you know, defining what strength in this case like means to you and how Anna can support you in enforcing that, you know, so, so yeah, I'd say that's it like, it's a so yeah, there's the there's my faith, there's my self parenting, and then there's like being of service to others. I feel as I feel like those are my strengths. I totally just like made I made all that up. So thank you for asking me on the spot. It's like I feel like you got back to me because I liked an icebreaker question for you at the beginning. So, there you go. We're even.

:

All of those are beautiful. And the reason why I like focusing on this is because if you look at yourself and you start defining yourself, and you want to go beyond the external, and look at yourself, what is something but then me that makes me strong. And then you find, you can do more than three, by the way, like, you don't have to stop at three. But you will find these things and then you start seeing yourself in a totally different light. And you start seeing yourself in ways that oh, maybe I didn't appreciate this about myself, but I should.

Jen Amos:

Yeah, well, thank you. I feel like I'm gonna be thinking more about this on my drive home, like what else do I consider a strength and just it could go beyond the three like you mentioned. So Well, Anna, thank you for you know, thank you for your conversation. Thank you for sharing your story, being incredibly transparent on your journey and having recovered from your healing from your eating disorder. So congratulations, and being able to help people and meet them where they're at and all the incredible work you do as a fitness trainer, it's been an absolute pleasure having you on our show, so thank you again.

:

Thank you so much. It was so much fun. Wonderful.

Jen Amos:

Okay, so give me one second. I'm gonna stop this recording.

Show artwork for Holding Down the Fort by US VetWealth

About the Podcast

Holding Down the Fort by US VetWealth
Stop following orders, think different, and manifest your dreams with the award-winning podcast, Holding Down the Fort by US VetWealth! For Season 9, we highlight motivational stories of personal development, financial awareness, and independence in our military community. The show is hosted by Jen Amos, a Gold Star daughter, Veteran Spouse, and Entrepreneur.

The show continues its partnership with The Rosie Network. Read more at https://issuu.com/therosienetwork/docs/me_mag_2023/16

We continue to showcase US VetWealth's partnership with Blue Water Advisors, which will feature conversations with Scott R. Tucker and Mike Wallace about career progression for military retirees seeking employment in post-military. Watch the most recent "Take A Knee" Live Show at https://www.youtube.com/@USVWTV/streams

Our main sponsor, US VetWealth, is proud to offer Life Insurance and Annuity Strategies for The High-Income Military Retiree. Let's help you capitalize on your above-average health and substantial income-earning potential for post-military life. For a free consultation, https://usvetwealth.com/

In the Fall of 2023, Jen Amos was sought after by InDependent to co-host the 8th annual InDependent Wellness Summit™. In August 2022, Jen Amos' work on the podcast was recognized by Disney Institute and she was hand-selected as the only non-Disney employee to moderate the first Military Spouse Employment panel for the Veterans Institute Summit. March 2022, former co-host Jenny Lynne has voted the 2022 Naval Station Norfolk Armed Forces Insurance Military Spouse of the Year. November 2020, Jen Amos was awarded “Media Professional of the Year” at The Rosie Network Entrepreneur Awards! The show continued to collect award nominations in the following years. In September 2021, the show made the Final Slate in the 16th Annual People's Choice Podcast Awards for the Government & Organizations category. In November 2021, the show was an Award Finalist for the 5th Annual National Veteran & Military Spouse Entrepreneur Awards. December 2021, the show was a Golden Crane Podcast Awards Nominee. September 2022, the show was a Finalist for the 13th Annual Plutus Awards presented by Capital Group for “Best Military Personal Finance Content.”

Holding Down the Fort has also been featured in multiple media outlets including Military Entrepreneur (M.E.) Magazine, MOAA’s Never Stop Learning Podcast, The Leadership Void Podcast, Lessons Learned for Vets Podcast, Sisters in Service Podcast, Get 2 Vet, Blue Star Families of Dayton & Southwestern Ohio, Legacy Magazine, U.S. Veterans Magazine, The American MilSpouse, VeteranCrowd Network, It's a Military Life, VirtForce, Military Veteran Dad Podcast, and much more.

"Jen has a beautiful way of capturing the essence of her guests. She listens with an open mind and heart to help expand the words spoken- bringing life, connection, and deeper understanding. The military life is never “easy” we merely learn how to adapt the best we know how to. It’s through continuing to build the community up that we will see a decrease in the mental hardships we sometimes face. Thank you for your work to bridge the gaps, build awareness, and give a voice to so many of us. With a variety of guests, there is truly an episode meant for you to hear. I look forward to continuing to support you Jen!" - Candice E. Van Dertholen, Ep. 190
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Jen Amos

As the co-owner of US VetWealth (i.e. Scott R. Tucker’s “better half”), I assist in creating educational content for military retirees seeking alternative options to the Survivor Benefit Plan and privatized financial strategies for your military retirement.

From growing up in a military family to becoming a Gold Star family member at 10 years old, I have first-hand experience with how a sudden transition to civilian life can impact a family emotionally and financially. 20+ years removed from military life, I started the podcast show Holding Down the Fort by US VetWealth in the summer of 2019 to get a pulse on the community today. I’ve come to find that our families still face similar issues that I faced in my childhood. It’s become a sense of responsibility to do my part in validating the stories and struggles of career military families. By the fall of 2020, I had been awarded Media Professional of the Year by The Rosie Networks' National Veteran and Military Spouse Entrepreneur Awards. Since then, the show has received five more award nominations and has been recognized by multiple media outlets, including the Disney Institute’s Veterans Insititute.

While the show is off-season, I focus most of my time building out US VetWealth’s Military Retirement Blueprint — the only resource for military retirees to learn about SBP alternatives and privatized financial strategies. Contrary to popular belief, retiring military officers and senior NCOs are, what we consider, high-income earners. Our FREE resource provides guides, courses, live training, consulting, and an ever-growing list of content for you to learn about your untapped potential and opportunities for post-military life. Access our free resource now by visiting https://militaryretirementblueprint.com/

You can read more about Jen Amos' work in the Summer 2023 Military Entrepreneur Magazine by The Rosie Network (Pg. 16).