008: "Advocate for yourself." How active duty military spouses can Begin Within and seek employment with Jaime Chapman

Jen Amos 0:00

There's no need to wait on your service member to share secondhand information anymore. Welcome to holding down the fort, a podcast show where we put military spouses and children's needs front and center so that they can make informed decisions together as a family. Because let's face it, we know who's really holding down the fort. Let's get started

all right. Hi everyone. Jen amo is here with holding down the fort podcast show and I am really excited. I have Jamie Chapman here with me today. She has served in the Army Reserves for six years. She's an active duty military spouse, the founder and CEO of begin within. Jamie also served as the Career and Employment advocate for over 10,000 military spouses has recently been nominated as the best military spouse owned business and won the Garrison's greatest award at her installation in Europe. Jamie, welcome to the show.

Speaker 1 1:11

Hi, it is a pleasure to be here, Jin, I am so stinking excited to be talking to you today.

Jen Amos 1:17

I'm very excited to talk with you as well. I know we spoke a couple of weeks ago. And I think we kind of hit it off right away, it seemed like there was a lot of opportunities for us to collaborate. And so naturally, it seems very fitting to have you on the show to talk about what you're doing. And you know, as one of the first things of us getting to know each other better and collaborating with one another. So I really appreciate you being on the show with us today.

Unknown Speaker 1:42

Yeah, it's my pleasure.

Jen Amos 1:44

Yeah. So let's just start off with talking about how did you hear about the podcast and more importantly, what inspired you to come on and share your story and what you're up to today?

Speaker 1 1:55

Well, I heard about the podcast because of you. I think I listened to it for the first time, you would only made three episodes at the time. And whenever I'd spoken with you, you were like, Hey, I do this podcast and I thought holy smokes, Jen's voice is incredible. I must go right now. So it was inspiring. It was really good. I think those first couple of episodes, were basically you were introducing yourself, introduce Scott. And then I was like, I've got to keep listening, because she's got I'm sure incredible folks lined out to be talking on this. So it's a really great platform for people to get up there tell their story, and talk about all those movers and shakers in the military community who are doing big things. And it's an incredible story to listen to.

Jen Amos 2:38

Well, I really appreciate you saying that, Jamie. And I always like to give myself a pat in the back when I know that people heard about this because of me or Scott.

Speaker 2 2:48

But you know, also I do appreciate what you said, is really putting the military community and families needs front and center. You know, there are a lot of resources and education out there that we'll get into a little later. But I don't think it doesn't hurt to have more. Sometimes people learn and receive information and in all different ways. And I think podcasting and listening to other people share resources and education is one way and so if I could just be that extra resource for the military community, and it helps at least one person, then I'm really glad. Well, Jamie, for people who are getting to know you for the first time, why don't you share just a little snapshot of your life, mainly what keeps you busy and excited nowadays?

Speaker 1 3:35

Busy is the bane of my existence. That word is get from my vocabulary so bad that I can't even see straight. So I'm a busy woman. I own a business, including myself. I have five employees and I'm actually bringing on a sixth person now. I'm a mom. I have a son that will be three years old this week. He just started preschool. I have a dog named Wally. He is 143 pound Irish Wolfhound, a black cat that likes to be really naughty and break things and scratch and bite our ankles don't know why. And I'm also an active duty military spouse. And so out of all of these hats that I wear, I'm a busy person. And so I'm spending 90% of my time during the the regular work day working on my business. I do volunteer in a couple of places. And I also serve for a nonprofit as the career advocate for 10,000 people. So that's wearing all the hats keeps me busy. That's my passion in life helping military spouses find jobs. I know how much of a nerd that makes me sound like but I had served in the Army Reserves a few years back for six years. But I have to be honest with you. My job as a military spouse is the hardest job I've ever had in my life. And I got thrown into this lifestyle and I was totally clueless about the resources that are out there for military spouses to Who's. And so I went through this whole year long period of time where I had no clue what I was doing. I didn't know where to go for those resources. And I was really struggling. So anyway, that's why I'm so passionate about helping military spouses not only transition into the military successfully, so that they know what the heck they're doing, but also in helping them find and maintain careers, because I think that maintaining it for the long term, that's the ticket right there.

Jen Amos 5:28

I like that you mentioned that being a military spouse has been one of the hardest things for you to do, out of all the roles you've played in your life. Because I think that, in general, military spouses are really the silent warriors. And they don't get praised enough for the sacrifices that they have to make. And it's true, it seems like they have to figure out a lot of things on their own. And the resources and education for them are not as easily accessible, or there's not enough awareness for them, would you? Is that something that you would agree with?

Speaker 1 6:04

Oh, yeah, amen to that the resources are there in abundance, there is no shortage of resources out there. But just one small example. Let's go this past week. I've like I said, serve for six years, I've been a military spouse now for almost four years. Some people don't realize they have access to the library, who has all of these really cool resources. For example, they have some of the top magazine subscriptions in the world and new subscriptions, such like New York Times, and Chicago Tribune, LA Times, Wall Street, journal, Washington Post all of these huge publications, you can go check in at your library and get these subscriptions to your phone or for your computer for free. My husband served for 17 years in the Army. And he did not know about this free when if so how could he you know, the information doesn't always trickle downhill? How could he possibly communicate that as his spouse if he didn't know about it? So just things exactly like that, that go on? Where there's a disconnect between the resources that are out there? And the people that need to hear about it the most?

Jen Amos 7:12

Right? Absolutely. It's kind of like, for one, the service member has access to all these things. But even if they were made aware of it, it's not like they can convey that same message to the military spouse. And so just like what you said, if they don't know, then how are you supposed to know

Speaker 1 7:32

if there is a lot like, for example, employment resources. So I started trying to put together a list of all of the organizations out there, whether it's the government for profit, nonprofit, companies that help military personnel, veterans and military spouses, get jobs in some form, or fashion, got to 54. This, these are nationwide programs. And I actually just got tired of researching, and I stopped at 54 people on the list. Knowing that individually in each city and region, there were even more employment resources locally. But I wasn't going down that rabbit hole, I got tired of doing all that research, and I quit. And I thought, You know what, here's the problem right here. The resources are there. They're there in abundance. But how do you possibly choose, you get overwhelmed, like walking on to Times Square in New York City? Which ad do you look at? Right?

Jen Amos 8:25

Right? When I remember my first experience of going to Times Square, I was just overwhelmed. And I was also kind of afraid, because I was so distracted by trying to process these ads. At the same time, I was trying to make sure that I had my bag in front of me, in case there were people trying to like steal my bag, like I don't know, I was just it was just such a new thing for me. And I think that's a great way to describe the resources that are available is you almost get at this paralysis of analysis, that you just don't want to do anything.

Speaker 1 9:02

Yeah, that's, that is the truth. It's information overload. There's, there's so many resources, there are misconceptions out there, that some of these resources are even bad, and you shouldn't do kind of like you get what you pay for free is bad. But that that is not the case. Any resource is a good resource, as long as you do your due diligence as the user of that and you do your research and find the right fit for you. But the important thing is that there are so many options that if you have a bad experience with one of them, you can move on and go to the next one.

Jen Amos 9:38

Right, definitely. So with that said, let's go ahead and transition into our educational topic today. And I know for you you wanted to talk about Military Spouse Employment, really what businesses can do to help and what spouses can do to help themselves. So we've already had a discussion about how There's so much information out there, that it could be very paralyzing for people to take action on them. Why don't we talk about Jamie? How do you help military spouses really sift through that information, or even begin, I view my

: 10:19

job as I am the bridge, and I connect people to the resources, the biggest part of my job is taking these big complex pieces of information and simplifying them. So people can actually understand the choices that they're going to make. So they don't get analysis paralysis. And I have to do, obviously, a lot of research on the back end on my end, and find out what recommended resources are out there that I like and enjoy that do quality work. And then I'm able to communicate effectively, how it can help you, if you're looking for a job if you're a military spouse, or if you're going through a career situation, and you need coaching. So I view my job is to simplify, really simplify the options that are out there and make it easy to choose one and be motivated to actually follow through and go through and utilize the resource.

Jen Amos: 11:13

And because there is a lot of people, a lot of resources out there already, how do you, let's say, capture the attention of a military spouse, and get them to trust you and what you can provide to them in terms of simplifying, you know, what their options are, and how they can, you know, take their next steps.

: 11:33

I think, again, it's just simplification of big stuff. Because if you just think about, in general, as a job seeker, no matter whether you're a military spouse or not, you're overwhelmed already, you're coming in, at an elevated stress level, you're worried it's worried about money, you don't know what to do it and you just kind of get caught up in this bin of things, you get caught up in the anxiety. And so a lot of the time, when I'm talking to somebody who's in that boat, they're like, Man, I'm a military spouse, I just moved, I'm living out of boxes, I can't find the charging cord for my laptop, how the heck am I supposed to apply for these jobs, cut a story got to de escalate, folks, build some rapport, gain some trust. And then once you get through the jungle, so to speak, and you get through all of the emotional stress piece of it, then you can actually talk and use logic and talk to folks, a huge piece of what I do is through the military spouse Advocacy Network, that I am their career advocate for 10,000 of their members. I just provide basic educational resources. And I personally just filter through the resources I like best. And I recommend those. But see, I think each of them, the ones that I like to recommend have a strong suit. And so I kind of say if you want a resume, go here and utilize this service, if you want career coaching, go here and utilize that service. And so I just kind of parcel out what I think is where the best place to go for which services. That way, they can just say alright, Jamie said this was the best place to go for career coaching. So I'm gonna go up here and sign up for my account now.

Jen Amos: 13:17

Yeah, absolutely. I think it's really awesome. I kind of want to dive more into how you even created your business. I love that, you know, when you became a military spouse, you realize that there was enough, not enough information out there, or at least at least it wasn't as easily accessible for you. But I'm curious to know how you have been able to create your business and employ five people and now you're about to employer six person and be as successful as you are today.

: 13:50

Me opening a business was born out of a hardship. So I used to work for the Army's transition assistance program. It's called SFL, tap Soldier for Life Transition Assistance Program. I make a joke, but it's true. laid off twice and promoted thrice. So throughout my tenure of working there for I think it was three years in total, I got laid off two different times and I got promoted three different times. Wow. And in general, you don't just get promoted three times in three years, for no reason you have to be really good at what you're doing. And so I started out kind of bottom tier career counselor worked my way up to be a senior career counselor and to be the manager of one location. And then I ended up being the regional manager for the largest concentration of servicemembers outside of the continental US. That's all in just a short amount of time while also having been laid off to different times in there because the army actually uses a contract for its Transition Assistance Program, which is crazy to me and contracts are so vulnerable. At one point in time 68% of the staff at SFL tap lost their jobs when I was there, including me. But now not focusing on that. What I ended up learning about myself was that I was an incredibly effective career coach for military folks, before I had started out my work in the industry in the career industry, I had worked at a nonprofit with special needs adults, and would try to integrate them into the workforce. And then when you when I switched gears and started working with service members, I really found where I fit the best, because I had been a service member. And those were my people. That was my tribe. And I can really speak that language. After I got laid off, the second time, I had previously started begin within it was just a hobby blog. I thought it was fun, my husband was deployed, I love doing it. Then I really started focusing on it. After I got laid off the second time, I got tired of getting laid off despite doing good work. And I just really decided to throw all of my to hedge my bets on opening the business.

Jen Amos: 16:02

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: 17:25

And so it actually I didn't start even selling any services until in 2018. So it's 2019, it's in August. So whatever month it was, in 2018, I actually started writing resumes for free for some of my friends, they really enjoyed their experience. And then they would tell their friends about me. And then at some point in time, the garrison had finally approved my packet to be an approved home based business. And then I started charging for it. And within a couple of months, I was overwhelmed with business, I had to hire help to come in and like start taking resume work for me. And then now in that short amount of time, I'm working on five and six folks, including myself for the team. I'm not saying I'm like a wild business success story or anything, but the business was born out of hardship. But we ended up starting off just doing great work. And we're really helping people. And so that's my business story. It's not maybe glorious or romantic. It was born because I got laid off. And it was just really mad. And I was like, Well, I'm gonna do my own thing now.

: 18:32

Well, I really appreciate you sharing that part of your story, Jamie, I think most good things come out of hardship. And out of tough situations. Like for example, I heard that. And someone can, you know, check the facts and let me know somewhere. But I heard that Disneyland started during some time after the Great Depression, and any any new hardship, I think good things come out of it. I also think it's awesome that you created this business. There's this statistic or this fact that has stuck with me since I've learned about it. So I'm just going to read it to you real quick. So this was it says according to the 2017 state of women owned businesses report by American Express, it goes higher unemployment rates, long term unemployment, and a much greater pay gap led women to start businesses at a greater rate out of necessity than the need to survive rather than a desire to seize a market opportunity. And the way that I interpret this is that because of your situation you really had at the end of the day, your only option was to build a business, and I can completely relate to that as well. So in my younger 20s Even though I supposedly looked good on paper, I was a college graduate, I got my bachelor's degree, and every job that I would apply for would hire me, but I would also get fired as well. So I've been, I've been fired four times in my life Jamie can set like consecutively like the four jobs ever got, I got fired. And then the last job I the fifth job I got before Scott and I moved from California to Virginia Beach ended up quitting just 10 months later, because I mean, one we were moving anyway. But two, I just couldn't do it. I was already at that point. This was years later, I got fired from four jobs where I was already self employed, where I just, I just couldn't go back to getting a job anymore. I just wasn't used to it. I was more used to, you know, working from home and dictating my schedule and stuff. And I just think that a lot of beautiful things come from hardship. And I don't think your story is boring in any way. I think it's very inspiring. And it's my hope that, you know, for our listeners and other military spouses to understand that there can be good things really good things that come out of hardship, wouldn't you agree? Oh, yeah, for

: 20:59

sure. I joke about that as a as a mom, my child is, we say it in the Chapman house, we say, parenting is the best worst thing that ever happened to me. I know that cutesy and funny, but it is so true. In general, a lot of the bad stuff brings a lot of the good stuff with it. And it's so that's how you grow right there. When you're uncomfortable when you're mad when you just lost your job for the fourth time. That's where the growth happens. And those are the people I'm so inspired by when I see those bootstraps stories about people coming up out of hardship, and I don't view myself in that way. But I just am so inspired by those stories that helps me keep take a lickin and keep on ticking.

Jen Amos: 21:49

Yeah, yeah, that's, that's a good thing. So. So with that said, why don't we talk about some action steps. So for military spouses, or I guess, really anyone that's listening to this, where you're in that situation, where you just don't know how to get a job, you know, you're in this, maybe you've gotten fired? Or maybe you're trying to do a career shift? What are some of the first, I don't know just some action steps you want to give to these military spouses or anyone listening to the show, to take action and to find those opportunities or resources or seek out that education to get employed again?

: 22:30

Absolutely, the first thing I would say is that you are a military spouse. And you are also a super human, and you're incredible, and you work hard, and nobody will ever appreciate the sacrifices that you make every day. So own that you have brass knuckles, and you are an incredible person and you work miracles every day just to show up somewhere on time I get it, your life is hard, and I live it every day. But it is the toughest life you'll ever have to choose to live. So just be drink some your own Kool Aid and realize that yeah, you legitimately are an incredible person. And you should be confident about that. The next thing is that, you've got to ask for help. This is so cool. You cannot leverage a resource. If you're a stay at home mom with three kids and you can't maintain a one hour telephone conversation with a career coach, you're not going to be able to sign up for these services. Unless you have a way of asking for help. You've got to ask for help. And you've got to get over your fear of imposing on people. Because you all reciprocate. It always comes out in the wash. If you ask for a favor, hey, watch my kids for an hour. So I can talk to a career coach on the phone, please, I need help. It'll always come out in the wash. Don't worry about stop worrying about stepping on toes. The next thing is that you've got to actually follow through and leverage those resources. If you don't know where to go for the resources. Heck, talk to me, say Hey, Jamie, I need a job where the heck do I go for this. And I will point you to a very quality free resource that you can go to for help. And I will do it because I love you and I appreciate you. So please just reach out to me and ask for help. I want to help you. More importantly, advocate for yourself. I can't say that enough. I can yell it to the sky. I can say it till I'm blue in the face. But there's not a single person out there that is going to advocate for your career and your well being and your joy and your happiness like you are. You're the only person out there who's going to really, really, really step up and do it. And if you aren't advocating for yourself, you can't expect some white knight in shining armor to come down and rescue your career for you. You've got to be the person to do it first. It's such a big mental shift to really own up and say, hey, if I don't do it, nobody else will. So I'm gonna learn about these resources, use them, and then actually be successful in my career because of them. So these are all I know, it's kind of high level, and I'm talking about you, but you've got to do it for yourself, and then realize the power of these resources. When you really take ownership, Extreme Ownership of your life and your career.

Jen Amos: 25:26

I really want to stress on what you brought, what you brought up first. And last, which is really advocating for yourself, I think about part of why I ended up in entrepreneurship and being my own boss and stuff is because I just wasn't getting the approval that I didn't realize I needed from other people, or the opportunities I needed. And so I had to look within kind of the name of your company because shameless plug. And but here's the thing, it's like, when you really become your number one advocate, it really like, I think that's the most empowering thing you can give yourself, because it won't matter what other people think of you. Because at the end of the day, you have you and I think that's what a lot of us have to realize is that at the end of day, we you know, we have ourselves and only ourselves, and we have to kind of be our adult ally to the inner child, or even just be an ally to where we're at right now in life. Because we know we know ourselves best. And if you're not trying to seek that out anywhere, and even if you do, when you do get out there, when you do get positive feedback, like when you do get that job, it's really just the cherry on top, it's like well, like because I advocated for myself, I was able to receive this. And even if anything negative does come, you can just kind of sift through that and you're like, well, that doesn't serve me anyway. So with that said, it's just I just love that you stress that to advocate for yourself. And from there, it should be really easy to identify what your needs are, and ask for help. And then actually, you know, see that help all the way through, because there's that saying that goes, when the student is ready, the teacher will appear. And so when you're ready to seek out help, you'll come to find, especially if people do talk to people such as yourself, Jamie, that there's a plethora of resources, and there really are people that want to help you and really break it down and simplify it for you. But it all comes back to advocating for yourself and understanding that you really are a superhuman, and you may not get praised every moment of every day, you know, your your service member is probably going to get more you know metals than you. But you know, you are still just as worthy and valuable. And you're really the one that's holding down the fort. Anyway, let's not forget service member comes home to you. And to just own it, just own it. And I know that there are these amazing resources for you today. So, Jamie, thank you, I appreciate you breaking that down to three simple steps for military spouses.

: 28:11

Right? Absolutely. And I'm happy as well, to share my recommended free career resources as well in the show notes. If you just want to hyperlink those, just be sure to check those show notes out, I have some places I recommend for career coaching, I have some places I recommend for resume writing, and career fairs and a whole lot more. So I encourage you to check out those show notes and see the actual recommendations that I do have for those free resources. Because, again, simplifying the complex things in life, there are so many things to choose from, it'd be a lot easier just to say, Hey, Jamie told me to come here. So I'm gonna go there, that'd be a lot easier. So

Jen Amos: 28:55

yeah, well, thank you for doing my job by announcing the show notes. By the way. I usually do that at the end. It's like, oh, it's so nice. Someone's helping me do that. I love it. I love it. I feel like for many people in general, the biggest thing is to just get over yourself and seek out that help. Because if you're just stuck in your head, and you're overwhelmed, and you're counting all of the reasons why you can't. It's hard to see like what's already in front of you and the people that can help help you especially in the military community. How many free resources out are out there?

: 29:30

Yep. And with military spouses, if you ask around. It's the unemployment rate is 24%. That's the official White House released number from 2018. There were even numbers released by blue star that were 30% unemployment. Can you imagine one quarter of a population of a 600,000 plus community of military spouses are unemployed? That's a lot of people. Huh. And this, I love it, get over yourself, that should be a hashtag. There 24% unemployment, we can blame it on the system, we can blame it on the lack of resources, which there are not a lack of resources, we can blame it on everybody that doesn't want to hire you. But when push comes to shove, if you get down and you work it out, if you put in the grit, right, if you put in the hard work, you will get a job will be employed, and you will keep that job. It's it's based on you. It's based on your work ethic, your perspective, your mindset, your willingness to go that extra mile, we can fix this 24% is huge. But if people get motivated and want to start helping themselves, they if military spouses start advocating for themselves, and leverage the resources that are already there, and we quit complaining and we quit being victims, you will find your success. And the hardship will only make you better. So I, I love military spouses, they inspire me every day. And I really want you to win. So please just don't give up. Don't quit and advocate for yourself, reach out to people like me, who can help you, I will point you in the direction of every free resource out there. If it will help you please just reach out and ask me for help. That's a good way to break the ice. I'm dying for you to ask me for help. Please just come to me.

Jen Amos: 31:28

Yes, exactly. That should be like a little, a little ad commercial in the show.

Oh, it'd be really funny. And, you know, I started this show, because I felt like in my narrow minded mind that there wasn't enough resources. And I'd like to believe that when people are listening in our show is debunking that myth that there are not enough resources in the community for them. And that, in fact, there are many, you just have to just seek it out. And once you're ready to do that, you'll come to find that it's not hard to get access to that and even sift through it. So I appreciate that pep talk, Jamie, to our audience, and for anyone listening, and I hope that you all are inspired to reach out whether it's reaching out to our show or reaching out to Jamie. Jamie, I think we had such an incredible conversation today about military spouses and sharing your story and how you started your business and how you're helping so many military spouses get employed. Do you have any closing thoughts for us, before we wrap up?

: 32:42

Again, break the ice, reach out to me ask for help ask anybody for help. In the shownotes there will be a link to places where you can go out and get mentors. And I know how techie that sounds to get a mentor. But there's never a shortage of folks out there that want to provide their wisdom and insight and help you. But more importantly, just it's, it's it's about asking, it's about reaching out and utilizing those resources. It's about, you know, hashtag Get over yourself, you're never going to get the help if you don't bother trying. And so I think that it's important just to reach out and try and sometimes getting told no is like the biggest blessing that you can have. But in general, the resources are there, the mentors are there, finding peers and if you're looking to be interested in working at a certain company or a certain agency for the government or something, finding people just to talk to you about what they do. It's all incredible. People are your number one asset. Social capital is the number one thing that you can leverage people's joint wisdom. But you've got to ask for it or you'll never get it.

Jen Amos: 33:54

Well, beautifully said and yes, this will be in the show notes as well. Jamie Why don't you tell people how they can get a hold of you if they want to reach out to you.

: 34:03

Okay, you can look me up on social my handle is at begin within 2016 I know that's really not cool handle behaves what I got, you can email me at Jay Chapman Cha P ma n at begin within dot life. Or you can just call our phone number which is way easy. It's 855-855-8511 You'll get somebody at my company and they can certainly point you in my direction.

Jen Amos: 34:37

Awesome. Jamie, I want to thank you so much for your time listeners. Thank you so much. And I look forward to seeing all of you on the next episode. Take care now. And hey, this

: 34:48

is Jamie Chapman, thank you so much for listening in today.